Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Enter da Wuuuuuu - yo breaf stank!
Man! How do you tell somebody that their breath stinks? Seriously! I have this co-worker of mine who's breath be kickin' like cheese and ham. I say like cheese and ham!!! He doesn't work in the same office as I do. However, he comes to my office quite often. Anywho.....I swear, each and every time he comes over to my desk to talk to me, I get a wif of his bad breath. The first few times I smelled it and then thought to myself, "Damn...this mug's breath is kickin." But...I didn't say anything. Nor did I let on that the nose hairs (if any) that I had were currently being deep fried by his awful breath.
Every Tuesday, we have squad meetings. Well, I got in the meeting late and ended up sitting next to Dragonfly. He was asking me something about my cases and then it happened. I got a wif of his breath again. Man...this was serious. Dude has a serious problem. This ain't no one time thing. This cat must have halitosis or something. As he was talking to me, I managed to glance into his mouth. You know, I'm just looking to see if I see a little man dressed in garbs of doo doo is hanging off his tongue. Surely, that has to be the problem. Nope....don't see one. But what I do see is mounds of tarter build-up on his teeth. Like...I don't think he's been to the dentist in a minute. Brushing teeth alone will not do the job for him.
Now my question is, how do you let on to a person that something is juuuuust not right about their breath? You may say, "Just tell him." Shiit. That's easier said than done. It always seems hard to tell people things that might embarrass them or make them feel bad....i.e. "your breath stinks....you're musty....you got a booger in your nose.....you have musty balls, funky monkey...etc." Know what I mean?
Every Tuesday, we have squad meetings. Well, I got in the meeting late and ended up sitting next to Dragonfly. He was asking me something about my cases and then it happened. I got a wif of his breath again. Man...this was serious. Dude has a serious problem. This ain't no one time thing. This cat must have halitosis or something. As he was talking to me, I managed to glance into his mouth. You know, I'm just looking to see if I see a little man dressed in garbs of doo doo is hanging off his tongue. Surely, that has to be the problem. Nope....don't see one. But what I do see is mounds of tarter build-up on his teeth. Like...I don't think he's been to the dentist in a minute. Brushing teeth alone will not do the job for him.
Now my question is, how do you let on to a person that something is juuuuust not right about their breath? You may say, "Just tell him." Shiit. That's easier said than done. It always seems hard to tell people things that might embarrass them or make them feel bad....i.e. "your breath stinks....you're musty....you got a booger in your nose.....you have musty balls, funky monkey...etc." Know what I mean?
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I actually thought about offering mints to him. I usually keep a can of altoids (not the ginger ones - lol) with me. But then I get pissed. One should know if something "just ain't right" about their personal hygiene. Know what I mean?
"Or you could just get a 4 year old in his presence. They will speak the truth to him!"You ain't neva lied about this! LMAO!
Dont you hate if you are digging the other sex and they have bad breathe what do you tell them. My goodness maybe he has halotois, bad coochie breathe, or need to use a better fighting toothpaste (Mentadent is my favorite)
Bad breathe is hard to tell someone, that is like saying around your gential areas dont smell so healthy. I go with Tamara everytime he is around offer him a mint or gum. Give him some of those Ginger Altoids. ha ha ha ha.
Everytime he comes around pull out a toothbrush and say
"Everytime I see you you make me want to brush my teeth. Don't you feel the same way when you see me?"
"You don't?"
"You probably should."
"Everytime I see you you make me want to brush my teeth. Don't you feel the same way when you see me?"
"You don't?"
"You probably should."
@Edwige- Chica, you're supposed to come with the remedies. LOL What happens if you don't have your scarf laced with perfume ofcourse, with you?
@Napkaboom - Holding your breath, huh? So what happens if you're having a long drawn out conversation? LOL "Uh...why your turning blue in the face?" hahahaha
@Tommie - Man...I WISH I had to balls to do that. I can't even do it. I'd feel bad. As a matter of fact, I feel kind of bad for talking about him because he's actually a really cool dude. *sigh* Oh well...
@Napkaboom - Holding your breath, huh? So what happens if you're having a long drawn out conversation? LOL "Uh...why your turning blue in the face?" hahahaha
@Tommie - Man...I WISH I had to balls to do that. I can't even do it. I'd feel bad. As a matter of fact, I feel kind of bad for talking about him because he's actually a really cool dude. *sigh* Oh well...
Just tell him, " I would probably give you some pussy if your breath wasn't kicking like the Van Damme brothers."
Bet his ass will be minty fresh the next mornin!
Bet his ass will be minty fresh the next mornin!
@Lboogie - Yeah...I could do that. But I'm sure he'd wonder why I always offer him gum or mints everytime he comes around. LOL Come to think of it, I have tried on a couple occassions to give him some gum. He declined. Maybe I should be like, "No...brutha. I'm not asking. I insist." You know...jokingly....but serious at the same time. LOL
@Brutha - He gets no punanny (in dave chappelle voice). Man...hell no! Uh uh...I don't think anything can help him. Listerine, Scope...nothing.
@Brutha - He gets no punanny (in dave chappelle voice). Man...hell no! Uh uh...I don't think anything can help him. Listerine, Scope...nothing.
dressed in doo doo garb. That's funny. I don't know what to tell you though. I've never had a problem telling people their breath stinks so I don't know. maybe just duck and cover when you see him coming.
I wouldnt know how to handle this either. I cant be mean and just outright be like YOUR BREATH IS FUNKAY! (unless it was my brother or sister or best friend)...
I guess just hold your breath while he's up in your face. *shrug* People that have that chronic stank breath usually cant help it- and even a mint doesnt realy help. Poor guy.
I guess just hold your breath while he's up in your face. *shrug* People that have that chronic stank breath usually cant help it- and even a mint doesnt realy help. Poor guy.
That was so funny, I got up and brushed my teeth. I'd hate to be all up in somebodies face with shit breath.
It's fun to find some black folks blogging.
I'll holla
It's fun to find some black folks blogging.
I'll holla
Tell that muthaf---a that you cannot carry on a conversation because you cannot think, due to the fire set to your brain by his hot ass breaf!!
nasty bastids
you ever smell someone's breath through their nostrils? like thier mouth is closed and you still smell the funk???
nasty bastids
you ever smell someone's breath through their nostrils? like thier mouth is closed and you still smell the funk???
ok I gotta register now since this is my second comment.
You guys are Insane! I"m laughing so much i'm crying...
LOL
I think you should leave his ass an anonymous note.best thing to do
Peace
I love reading your blog
I'm trying to see if you guys did anymore surreal life episodes!
Nurse Mary
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You guys are Insane! I"m laughing so much i'm crying...
LOL
I think you should leave his ass an anonymous note.best thing to do
Peace
I love reading your blog
I'm trying to see if you guys did anymore surreal life episodes!
Nurse Mary
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