Monday, January 31, 2005


Caught in the crossfire IV

[Disclaimer: I'm new at this disclaimer thing. As a matter of fact, I've never disclaimed anything on here. However, let me just say that the people and events mentioned in this entry are fictitious. LOL I'm lying. Aside from the pseudonyms and a few EXTRA bits, everything is really true. This is a true story! Although, I did spruce up the ending just a bit. all the Cutiepie incident. Referring to her appearance during the hand on booty episode towards the end.]

By this time, my co-worker got back into the car. I had to bite my tongue again and continue to let her EARBEAT me to DEF. I didn’t want him to be all up in my bidness. So I just sat there. This was so hard because when somebody is talking nonsense in my ear, it’s hard for me to not respond. Especially when they call themselves “checkin” me. Know what I mean? Plus remember, she came at me out of no where with this mess.
Eventually, I got off the phone with her. I didn’t have time for that bullshit. I told her that I would call her back later.
Well…I’ll be damned. Cutiepie beat me to it. She called me shortly after I got off work and commenced to question me about shit again. WTF is up with this chic? She’s nagging me like I’m her damn woman! This time, I really let her have it. Again…we went back and forth She will not back down for nothing. She kept bringing up how I treated her back in damn 1999. It’s like…she was beating a damn dead horse. Geesh! The muhfugga is dead already! Anyway, by the time it was all said and done, I was crying, she was crying…it was crazy. We talked off and on all damn evening. I apologized time and time again for treating her the way I did. I mean, I didn’t know what else to say. That’s the only thing that I was at fault for.
Ok. So that was how things were going with Cutiepie. I spoke with Bird that same evening. I was upset about some things that Cutiepie mentioned to me that apparently Bird told her I said. Bird really didn’t have much to say. I was clearly upset though. The following morning, Bird called me while she was on her way to work. She told me that she couldn’t handle all of this. Basically, she said in so many words that she couldn’t handle me being Cutiepie’s friend too. She said that she needs me but I can’t be there for her and Cutiepie. She kept saying that she won’t have anybody to talk to now. She said she can’t deal with knowing that Cutiepie and I are friends because she has come to HATE Cutiepie. She told me that she understands that Cutiepie needs me too and it’s good that I am there for her during this rough time. So…in so many words, she told me that she couldn’t handle being my friend…right now. WTF? Ok…what just happened? Did this bitch just tell me that she doesn’t want to be my friend anymore?!? This was absolutely TOO MUCH! Here my friends, is where I TOTALLY felt as if I was caught in the muhfuggin crossfire. Between two damn quasi-lesbian bitches. Aint that ‘bout a blip?
Anyway, days went by and Bird didn’t call me and I didn’t call her. But…Cutiepie damn sho kept in touch with my ass. Well, for one, she was without car and I basically, took Bird’s place. In that I took her to work, picked her up from work, blah, blah, blah. You know…wherever she needed to go, I took her. Even throughout all that, things were still kind of tense between the two of us. It was like; I knew she had something to say. We continued to beat the damn dead ass horse. Eventually, I think we came to terms and basically picked up from where we left off a few years ago.It was during this time that I learned things about Cutiepie that I didn’t already know. It was cool. She confided in me about a lot of other things that were going on with her. I was glad to be there….to be her friend. This girl has actually been through it. Seriously. Cutiepie and I actually spent a whole lot of time together. She was always at my place. Before work, after work…etc. She would spend the night. Eh…sorry. NO hand-on-booty details here. Hee hee Although, I have to admit, during this time I realized why I probably was so jealous of Bird and Cutiepie’s relationship. It came to me one night while Cutiepie was here. I think that I used to be attracted to Cutiepie back in the day. I look at her now…she is such a Cutie! Hence the pseudonym, Cutiepie. I’ve never really thought I was actually attracted to a woman. But…the more I thought about it, I realized that…yeah….Brown Sugar was attracted to Cutiepie. But…not in a way that I’d actually hit on her. Never that. One…I’m TOTALLY not an aggressive person. Like, I’d never make the first move. Two…I love me some ding-a-ling. However, if for some reason, Cutiepie was to make a move on Brown Sugar….I don’t know. It’s like…she’s always around. She calls me all day and day. Mind you, she has her car back now so it’s not like she’s just around because she doesn’t have a car. We talk about sex a lot. I realize that we both have hearty sexual appetites. Although, it could be because we both haven’t had any sex in a while. I don’t know. Like this past weekend, she was here. We had an ice storm down here and were basically shut in. But…Cutiepie was like, “I should come over there.” Hmmm…I’m thinking (lil devil on shoulder) “yeah…you should.” Hee hee Wait a minute Brown Sugar! You’re trippin! You need to get you some good ole ding-a-ling to help you simmer down a taste. LOL Oh…*sidenote* This would explain why I wasn’t able to complete my entry this weekend. It’s like, when I’m on the computer, she’s always standing right next to me at some point. So I knew if I was sitting here typing a while, she’d find her way over here. But seriously, I almost feel like this chic is my girlfriend. She’s MynotWoman. Muhahahahahahaha! That one’s for you KK. I know. I know. It’s soooo NOT the same thing. But on the serious tip, besides the fact that Cutiepie and Bird are both my friends – well not sure about Bird – I wouldn’t even go there with Cutiepie. As cute as she is. But…would a good ole threesome count????? Hmmm…a thought to ponder on. Let me just shed some light on me and Cutiepie's history. We used to be REALLY tight. I met her two weeks after I moved down here. She was going to school down here at the time. We met on a double date. We befriended each other. It was a start of a wonderful friendship. We became really cool. A few months later, I had a few friends over one night. Cutiepie was there, ofcourse. We were playing this game called "Pennies." Basically, everybody sits in a circle with a handful of pennies. It's supposed to be pitch black in the room. Everybody goes around the circle and asks a question. The questions usually range from, "Did you just fart to Has anybody ever had sex with somebody of the same sex?" Just to give you an idea. If the answer is yes, you throw a penny in. If the answer no, you don't throw a penny in. Anyway, by the end of the night, we gave up on playing Pennies and just talked about our sexual experiences. Oh...did I mention that we were all drunk? This was during a time when I was REALLY curious about the whole "same sex" thing. Not really a relationship thing. Just sex. Does it make a difference? Apparently, I wasn't the only female that felt that way. To include Cutiepie. All the niggas were like, HELLS NO! Well by nights end...or beginning. I ended up in the bed with another one of my girlfriends(not Cutiepie...she was drunk...and sleep at that point) that was there and two other guys. was interesting. Ok, if you're not open or if this is to skanky for you, stop here.
Well, it started with us taking body shots off of each other. Cutiepie was passed out so she wasn't a participant at this point. Well, Guy friend#1 was the main one egging us on. He was actually my road dawg. We went to school together and he always managed to fanaggle me into things such as this. Anywho, first the girls were taking body shots off the guys. Then...guy friend #1, talked us (two chics)into taking body shots off of each other. She was my road dawg too as well as college pal. Well...we did. And thing led to another. The guys were excited at the sight of us licking/sucking the salt off of our nipplege and thigh areas and I must say that I, uh...was just excited. Shii...we all were excited. This is how we ended up in my bedroom. All damn four of us! Boy oh boy! I remember that night like it was yesterday. (harp music...daydreaming....) Ok...where was I? Ok...yeah. Don't ask me how our clothes got off. That...I can't remember. All I know is we were all butt booty ass naked on my bed. But...guy#1 was on my girl and guy #2 was doing his thang with me. Kissing....hand on booty here and there....sucking, licking....etc. Well...during a brief intermission, somebody came up with the smart idea to switch partners. While my guy and my girlfriend went into the bathroom, guy #1 and I laid on the bed. While, we've kicked it many times in school, we never took it there. He was my road dawg! much for that. It was on....quick...over...and good. LOL It's amazing how Tequila can spice up a night! The other two came back to the bed and we all fell asleep...butt booty ass naked. At some point during the early, still dark outside, morning, guy #2 rolled out. That left me, my unnamed girlfriend and guy#1 in the bed. I was exhausted at this point. But not too exhausted for some good ole sex. Better yet, to watch some good ole sex. Did I mention that I am a voyeur? I LOVE to watch others...have sex. Well, this was perfect. I had front row seats. Hand-on-booty details at it's best! Ok...guy#1 and my girlfriend were next to me, rubbing on each other and shit. I'm laying on my side, face towards them.'s still dark. I don't move because I want them to think that they're in their "own world." Well, I continue to lay there like I'm dead to the world. Guy #1 is going to town on my girl's coochie. I was getting soooo damn excited...but I had to play it off, ofcourse. He works his way back up her body and then the next thing I know, he's fucking the mess out of her. I still try to play it off like I'm sleep. But who can really remain sleep when the bed is rocking like a damn boat on a stormy night?!? Apparently me! Cuz I didn't move at all. The only thing that did move on me were my eyes! LOL They weren't paying my ass no mind. was intense. I couldn't take it! I'm laying there like a damn stump on a log. My boy is fucking the mess out of my girl. All I hear is her moaning, him groaning and her wet ass coochie making all kinds of noises. It was UNBEARABLE!!!! I couldn't take it. I just had to start pleasing myself at this point. When I tell you that I think we all came at the same time....I am not lying. Ok...but it wasn't even over. At this point, I wasn't even trying to front like I was sleep. Shii....I had front row 3 fuckin D vision! My girl wasn't NO where near done. She rolled on top of my boy and went downtown to pay "PeterMan" a visit. I mean, she sucked and she sucked that thang like it wasn't nothing to it. I had to take some visual notes to store in my mental roladex. The girl was BAD! And I'm not talking Bad as in terrible. She worked that thang. I should have been licking his balls as close as I was to his member while she was sucking it. Remember? I like to watch. Anyway, the next thing I knew, she mounted ole boy before I could blink my eyes. And there I was...still down by his dingaling. Face to face with his dick and her coochie. This is my favorite part of pornos ya'll. I LOVE...absolutely, LOVE to see the ding-a-ling go in and out of the coochie. I'm down there watching all this. The smell of sex was heavy in the and out....I witness juices flowing, asses pounding, hand-on-booty...sound of wet coochie. You know the sound. Yeah...that's it. Damn...I was going to fucking explode! Anywho, at some point during all this, I look up at the doorway. The door was wide open. I saw Cutiepie sitting on the couch...looking at us. Apparently, she too was in heat. She laid there with her hand in her panties. I looked at her...she looked at me. I looked back at my girl mounted over my boy and....that's it ya'll. I can't give you no more. Dammit! I'm getting excited over here thinking about that shit again. Thank goodness for my wassically wabbit. I have any batteries? I gotta go. I hope I gave you enough hand-on-booty details. hee hee This story took a damn tractor trailer wide right turn. But...I just wanted to give you a little history about where me and Cutiepie's friendship came from and what all, rather, SOME things that it involved. Although, it never involved Cutiepie and I EVER getting down with one another. Will it ever happen? Eh...I doubt it. Is this enough hand-on-booty detail for ya????? wink, wink

Thursday, January 27, 2005


Caught in the crossfire pt. III

Edwige, I’m going to try to make this as juicy as I can. Although, I don’t think it will compare to that one story you forwarded to me! Ok…here comes the fire…and desire. I’ll have you know that this story is all true and concurrent. Well….it’s MOSTLY true. I may throw in a few extra ish here and there. You’d never know though. Mkay....Let’s get to it.

Bird and Cutiepie got back together as you already know. Bird was very much content because as I stated in previous entry, she felt they were destined to be together. Especially since they both moved back down here without knowing each other were here. Anywho, all was good between the two of them. Finally, the time came for Cutiepie and I to come face to face. Remember, we hadn’t seen each other since she and Bird moved from down here. Before I actually saw her, Bird and I discussed the whole issue between Cutiepie and I. I told her that I felt bad about how I treated Cutiepie and I really wanted to talk to her about everything. I still couldn’t explain why I acted the way I did. It’s been a few years and I still can’t come up with a perfect excuse why I treated Cutiepie the way I did. Bird thought that was a good idea. She said she’d mention it to Cutiepie as well. So anyway, I went over to Bird’s house and Cutiepie was there. It wasn’t as awkward as I thought it was going to be. It was actually pretty cool. All three of us sat around talking. Although, we didn’t discuss the beef Cutiepie and I had. It was a pretty good “reunion,” so to speak. A couple of months went by and things between the two of them. I mean, all was well as far as Cutiepie was concerned. It was Bird…. I already told ya’ll how flighty she can be at times. *smh* Well, I failed to mention that Bird was and had been attracted to this girl she works with. She thought this girl was the finest thing. I mean, she was alright. I didn’t particularly care for her but that’s a whole ‘notha story. Anyway, Bird and this girl would hang out periodically. Bird even introduced Cutiepie and her coworker. Unbeknown to Cutiepie, Bird had the HOTS for her coworker. Well one Friday evening, Bird and her coworkers went out for dinner and drinks after work. They were all good and drunk by the time it was all over with. Well, Bird went back to her coworker's house. They sat, talked and even flirted. This was nothing new because according to Bird, they always flirt with each other. You know how they say a drunk mind speaks a sober heart, right? Well, Bird started telling her coworker how she had been attracted to her for the longest. Interestingly, the coworker had the same attraction for Bird. The next thing you know they were kissing. I'm not talking about pecky peck kisses. I'm talkin' bout tongue down your throat kisses. It was ON! They moved from the living room to the bedroom. And know. It got heated. hee hee Ok...I said I wasn't going to spare too many details. Well, in Bird's own words...She claimed that this girl had THE most perfect body she had ever seen. She said her titties were so perky that they looked fake. Ofcourse, I told Bird that she must not have seen my body then! LOL I'm kidding. I didn't tell her that. I didn't say anything because ofcourse, I was listening intently to the hand on booty details. I only spoke when I felt like she was slacking on details. Bird said they went on for hours and hours. She said that her coworker was soooo passionate. She loved the way she kissed her. She loved the way she touched her. Blah, blah, blah. All I wanted to know was, "Did you eat her coochie and did she eat your coochie?!? Was it fat? Was it juicy? What? I want details dammit! You know the routine!" I know you're laughing but I be serious when it comes to getting my hand on booty details. You betta believe it! Anyway, while all this was going on, Cutipie was waiting for Bird to come back home. No...Bird and Cutiepie don't stay together. Well, not really. Cutiepie is just always there. Bird finally made it home around 4:00am. She got in the bed and even attempted to kiss Cutiepie. For some reason, Cutiepie was not feeling it. She said, "Uh uh...." and turned over. I told Bird she was trifling because she could have at least washed her face before she tried to give her girlfriend some sugar after she was out all night with the same lips she was eatting some other girl's coochie with. My goodness! Ok...(sound of cassette tape fast forwarding). The holiday season was upon us. Cutiepie had been working Bird's nerves something serious. Cutiepie's car had been repossessed and she was looking for a job. Bird was getting tired of taking care of Cutiepie. Cutiepie was contemplating going home for Christmas but she didn't have the money for a flight. Bird wanted Cutiepie to go so bad she paid for her ticket. She convinced Cutiepie to go because she felt she needed to be with her family. She told Cutiepie that she would be going out of town too so it be good for her to go especially since she wasn't going to be home. You know, she didn't want Cutiepie to be down here by herself for the holiday. Little did Cutiepie know, Bird wasn't going any damn where. Bird was planning on spending the week with her coworker. She was looking forward to the many nights of hot passionate lovemaking. Well, the day came for Cutiepie to leave. Bird dropped her off at the airport and headed home for what she called "peace and quiet." Cutiepie was CONSTANTLY nagging her about something. She just couldn't take it anymore. She needed a break. And well...she got it.

Have you ever actually felt like your significant other was up to no good? Apparently, this is how Cutiepie was feeling. She periodically called Bird to see how her trip home was going. Ofcourse, Bird claimed to be having the time of her life with friends that she hadn't seen in a while everytime Cutiepie called. Bird was scheduled to come back here the day before Cutiepie. Perfect timing, huh? Cutiepie called Bird right before Bird's flight was scheduled to leave. Bird answered the phone and said in a low, whispered voice, "I'm on the plane. I'll call you when I get to Hometown, USA." Then she hung up. When Bird told me that ish, I fell out laughing! I couldn't believe she not only lied but went through the motions of whispering and then rushing her off the phone as if she was really on a plane! A little while later, Bird said that Cutiepie started calling her on her cell phone. She forgot to turn her phone off! She was supposed to be in the air. Well, the next thing she knew, Cutiepie sent her a text message and told her that she was "full of ish." Bird started panicking then. She was like, "OMG! Do you think she knows? Do you think she called the airline for my flight info?" I was like, "Girl..I don't know. If so you can either tell her the truth or...that's your story and you're sticking to it." Well...we talked about it for a few minutes longer but I had to cut our conversation short because I was on my way up to DC for New Years Eve. I was leaving out that night and stopping in NC overnight with my linesister and her family. So I'm packing up my truck and what not. I walk back into my house and did some last minute things. My phone rang. It was Cutiepie. OMG! What was she calling me for?!? I didn't answer. For one...I didn't know what she wanted. Well, I called Bird back and told her that Cutiepie had just called me. Ofcourse, Bird panics some more. "What is she calling you for? Call her back. Call her back." I was like, " I'm not finna get in the middle of this." She already used me in a lie she told earlier that I didn't want anything to do with." Hell...Cutiepie already thought I was Bird's co-conspirator. That's a whole 'notha story too. This is already getting long as heck. Well, I decided to call Cutiepie back. She wanted to know when the last time I spoke with Bird. She also wanted to know if I knew Bird's parent's phone number. I told her that I'd call her back because I had to look for it. I had the number but...I had to kill time and call Bird first. Damn Bird! make a long story short, Bird finally called Cutiepie back and admitted that she was already home. But...she told her that she came back the day before but lied to her about it because she needed a break. That just opened up another damn can of worms. Ofcourse they argued and fought (via phone) like cats and dogs. Bird told Cutiepie that she was emotionally draining her. She couldn't take it anymore. So....they broke up. On to the new year. That was the end of that. Right? WRONG! It was only the beginning of more drama! This would be a perfect place to end the story. hee hee But...I'm going to continue for the sake of not dragging the story on and on. Well, the following week Cutiepie called me and asked me for a ride downtown. She had a job interview and wanted me to drop her off. I told her I would do it. So I picked her up. We chit chatted and what not. I didn't mention Bird and she didn't mention Bird. I dropped her off at her job interview and headed back to work. Before leaving her, I told her to call me when she finished. If she didn't find a ride back home by the time I left for work, I'd pick her up and take her back home. Well wouldn't you know it? She called me. I picked her up and then we went to pick up my son. She mentioned something about Bird coming over later to bring her stuff. Then she asked me if I would take her over to Bird's so that she could pick up a few things. I didn't really mind know. I figured it would be a little awkward. And boy....awkward it was. Once we got over there Cutiepie went straight up the stairs, little words to Bird. Bird was all friendly and ish...trying to play it cool. Then here I was, acting like I was totally oblivious to what was going down. So I sat downstairs and waited for Cutiepie to come back downstairs. Bird eventually came downstairs and whispered, "Leave...go outside." I was like, "Cool...I'm out." So I sat my ass in the car and waited. Cutiepie came out about 10 minutes later. She looked slightly upset but didn't say much. I asked her if she had everything she needed and she said, "Yeah...I'll get the rest of my things later." We drove off and there was kind of an awkward silence. I didn't say ish. Then out of nowhere Cutiepie said, "Some people think you're stupid. Some people don't realize a good thing til it's gone." I just continued driving...saying nothing. I dropped Cutiepie off at home and then I made my way home.
The following weekend, I had a gathering. I had invited both Bird and Cutiepie. It turned out that Cutiepie had to work so she couldn't make it. Bird was slated to appear. The night went on, Bird didn't show. I was kind of pissed because Bird always pulls a no-show when I have gatherings. She always gets sick or falls asleep. But she'll call you all the way up until the event starts and says she's on her way and never shows. I don't know why she does that ish.
Cutiepie called me early the next morning. One thing about Cutiepie, she will call you about 10 times a day. You know how you're on the phone with somebody and you can tell they have something to say but they never say it. It's always like that when I talk to Cutiepie on the phone. Anyway, while were talking I brought up how Bird didn't show up to my gathering and how she always does ish like that. Now...before you go to thinking that I'm talking about Bird behind her back, think again. I tell Bird all of the time how flighty she is. She never denies it. Even she knows how flighty she is. She's like that with everybody. Anyway, why'd I open that can of worms. That just set Cutiepie off. She went on and on about how Bird did her wrong and how she's a lier. She's telling me things that I already know - only her version. It wasn't that much different though. I didn't tell Cutiepie anything Bird told me. I just listened. She went on for about an hour and then we got off the phone.
The following day, Cutiepie called me while I was working. I was out checking some locations with my co-worker. I'm sitting there in the passenger seat and my phone rings. I see it's Cutiepie so I answer...
Me: What's up girl?
Cutiepie: Are you busy?
Me: Nah...not really.
Cutiepie: I got something to ask you. Have you and Bird ever messed around?
Me: *silence*silence*silence*
Cutiepie: Hello?
Me: (slightly thrown off and getting kind of pissed) No, we've NEVER messed around. (All the while thinking, didn't Bird tell you that we never messed around each time you asked her?!?"
Cutiepie: (in an excited tone) I mean, I'm just wondering because I've always thought you and her messed around.
I'm not going to go through the entire conversation we had. I was trying to be a little discreet because I was riding shotgun in the car with my coworker. I didn't really want him to hear and witness all that drama. I was getting pissed because she just came out of nowhere and asked me that ish. Actually, it wasn't the fact that she asked me that question. It was more the WAY she asked me. The tone of her voice is what pissed me off. She was trying to "check" me. She BASICALLY went off on me. I didn't appreciate that ish. coworker, sensing I needed a moment, stepped out of the car. I was FUMING! I went slam the FUCK off! I was pissed. Now I see WTF Bird was saying about this chic. Damn! First of all, don't be calling me while I'm fuckin at work asking me 'bout some damn bullshit that you could have asked me about the day before while we were on the phone. It was crazy! Cutiepie has the kind of high pitchy type voice. She was excited and I was excited. We both were upset. The more I thought about it, I realized that this was bound to happen anyway. I had to get off the phone with her. I was fighting mad! Emotions were too high. I was more involved in this than I thought I was....

I'm sorry, I can't finish this. I mean, this entry is already mad long. I PROMISE, PROMISE I'll finish this weekend. I don't want to give you TOO MUCH to read in one setting. I'm afraid I might not keep your attention. The story is really not too much longer. Now....I am going to finish the next entry but I'm not going to post it until Monday afternoon. Possibly before. Reason being, I don't want you to read it thinking it is part III and then be ahead, yet still behind. (smile)

Wednesday, January 19, 2005


Happy Birthday Kajuana!!!

Woohoo! (in my most raspiest voice) Welcome to Club Thirty!! I hear you're having a shebang on Friday. Well, be sure to sip on a gimlet or any other drink of choice for me! F*ck a sip! Down those muthafreakers for me!!!! Unfortunately, I won't be in attendance. (...and the crowd lets out a a moan.) I know. I know. But...the show must go on!!!! And I'm sure you, our ls's, the Dawij crew...maybe even "Z" and "H" will party the night away. hee hee Hmm...maybe I'll hit the town and party it up for you on Friday. You know...have my own little kk birthday party concurrent (ATL style) with yours. How 'bout dat? Ooo-oop! Ooo-oop!Ooo-oop, Ooo-oop, Ooo-oop!

Oh...just in case you're tuning into my page and think that I still haven't completed part deux, click here. I'll have you know that the entry has been completed however the saga still continues.

Saturday, January 15, 2005


Caught in the crossfire pt. II

***First off, let me apologize for my delay in posting. I have been sicker than a dog for the past week. And just a few days ago, I lost my damn voice. I sound like a damn hoarse bullfrog. I know I don’t need my voice to type…but damn! A sistah was feeling real bad. So bad, that I didn’t feel like sitting down at my computer to type ish! Now you know I was feeling bad because I’m the email/internet QUEEN! Secondly, wouldn’t you know it? I actually did complete this entry a few minutes ago. I tried to publish post and the muhfugga is currently lost in friggin cyber space! I’m pissed!! So here we go again!

I don't even know how long Bird and Cutiepie had been gone before I actually spoke to either one of them. Well, better yet, until I spoke to Bird. Remember....Cutiepie and I weren't really on the best of terms anymore. That time period is such a blur to me right now. However, I do believe that by the time I spoke to Bird again, she and Cutiepie had broken up. Bird and I started talking on a regular again. Bird advised me that she and Cutiepie were constantly bickering. She said they never saw eye to eye on anything. They even had a few physical altercations here and there. What is it about same sex relationships? Why are they so volatile? I couldn’t even tell you because I have never been in a same sex relationship. Unless threesomes count. ROFLMAO!!!! Woo! That girl is CRAZY as HELL!!! Anywho…
Bird is on the prowl for another chickadee. While visiting some friends in NYC for Black Gay Pride weekend (is there really such a thing?), she went to this club. While Bird is not openly “gay” she has no problem being present at said venues. If you ran into her on the street, you’d think she was a typical pretty black woman that loves men. Actually, I don’t know if she’d be classified as “gay”. I mean she likes men too. I guess that would make her gay-esque, huh? LOL Ok….Bird is chillin’ in the club and becomes mesmerized by a sexxy hot temptress. She’s not sure if she’s really fascinated or if it’s the “Vitamin E” she’s high on that has her feeling that way. Bird and said chic somehow start talking, dancing, touching….and I’ll be damned, kissing! I wasn’t there but boy….I would have LOVED to be a fly on the wall to see all this transpire. For one, I would have probably fallen off the wall and been stepped on by another drug induced partygoer. SPLAT! (sound of me, the fly, being stepped on.) Man! I don’t know why Bird was feeling so frisky. Grant it, it could be attributed to the Brazilian wax she had earlier that day. I don’t know. I mean, a good ole Brazilian wax always leaves me feeling a tad bit frisky myself. That is, after I’ve gotten over the pain and desire to slap that lady upside her head. But this ain’t about me. Wait a minute. I’m supposed to be telling you how I’m caught up in the crossfire. Right? I’ve somehow veered off path and went quasi-Black Erotica on that ass. My name ain’t Zane. LOL Although, I could probably tell you some “Sex Chronicles.”
You’re probably wondering how I know so much about Bird. Well one, she tells me everything. What she doesn’t tell me I INSIST she tells me. Especially when it pertains to sex or anything leading to sex. I must know every hand on booty detail. I can’t help it. I have to live vicariously through her.
Bird and the chic from the club hooked up a few times after that night. Eventually, Bird got tired of her and chewed her up only to spit her out. Patooey! She became bored with her. Besides, she only liked her because she had big titties like Cutiepie. Speaking of Cutiepie….Bird and Cutiepie got back on speaking terms. Bird asked me if she should get back with her. I told her to go for it. So, after a short-lived relationship, Bird and Cutiepie went there separate ways….yet again. But not before Bird gave me every hand on booty detail. LMAO
So…Bird hooked up with this guy that had been in pursuit of her. He was a cool cat. We all went to school together. I wouldn’t exactly picture him with Bird, but hey. Bird eventually bit the worm. They eventually went out, she f*cked him, chewed him up and spit him out to be chewed by another birdie. Typical Bird thing to do. Well, Bird decided to move back down here. Yay! I was excited. I was looking forward to her return. It was going to be just like old times! Once she got here we were inseparable aside from work and other miscellaneous things we did on a day to day basis. It was cool. Plus, Bird loves to drag me out to places she can’t get any of her other girlfriends to go to….i.e. Strip clubs, gay clubs. I don’t care. As long as I can get my drink on and be slightly inebriated by the end of the night, I’m good. She was on the prowl (as usual) for another chickadee. She met a few girls online and made arrangements to meet them in person. Out of the three, I actually met two of them. Boy…what is it about meeting folks online? They lie! Oooh they lie! These girls…well. Let’s just say, they were no eye candy. They didn’t look NOTHING like their pics. LOL I don’t date women but I’ll tell you this. I damn sho wouldn’t have dated either of them if I did. After getting past all the niceties I quickly exited stage left and waited for things to simmer down. Damn…I’m doing it again. Veering off path. Hell, I’m not veering off path. I really never got into my purpose of writing this entry. I’m getting there. I’m getting there. Bear with me! This sh*t is interesting though, huh? Ok…so let’s fast forward a year or more. Bird calls me one day this past August while I’m out of town and said, “Me and Cutiepie have been talking again.” Ok…my mouth is slightly ajar and I have to admit, I had a slight “tude.” Why? Because I’m kind of tired of the whole Bird and Cutiepie thing. For one, they continue to go back and forth knowing they have all of these unresolved issues. You know how it is when your friend is dating somebody and they always tell you the bad things about their significant other? Well…yeah. That’s how it is. Anywho, it just so happened that Cutiepie also moved back down here a year before Bird even got here. They hadn’t spoken so they didn’t know each other were here. Bird apparently thought they were destined to be together. WTF-ever! As you already know, they ended up getting back together. Back to where it all started! And the story goes on…

Thursday, January 13, 2005


Caught in the Crossfire pt. I

Have you ever felt like you were caught in the crossfire of two friends? That's how I feel right now. This can be a long ass story. I'm trying to figure out how to go about it without making it a long drawn out story. *rubbing chin* I'll see what I can do.
Ok...about six or seven years ago a good friend of mine moved here. She had been apartment hunting and finally settled on one particular apartment community. Well, it just so happened that another one of my good friends happened to live in the same apartment community. The time came for her to move in. Not only did she move into the same apartment community, but she moved into the same building as my other good friend. One flight of stairs up, as a matter of fact. Ok...let me give my friends names before it gets confusing. (...thinking of good pseudo names) Ok...I got it. Good friend that relocated here is Bird. Good friend who already lived here is Cutiepie. I was excited about my friends being neighbors. Especially with Bird being new to the area. I thought it would be good for her to get know Cutiepie in the event that she needed something. Well time went on and Bird and Cutiepie started spending a lot of time with each other. I mean, they shared a lot of the same habits. Both of them LOVED to smoke weed. I'm not talking about a weekend type of thing. I'm talking about they smoked damn near everyday. I wasn't a weed smoker so I didn't kick it with them as much as I used to at one point. Bird would call me and say, " and Cutiepie went here or we went there...blah, blah, blah." I started feeling left out. (speaking of feeling left out, I'm leaving so much out already) Anyway, part of me started getting jealous because I felt like damn....I introduced these two heifas, my friends and they don't even include me in any of their reindeer games! Well, I left out that my friend Bird is Bi-Sexual. Well...knowing Bird the way I know her, I automatically assumed that she had hit on Cutiepie in some form of fashion. I mean, she's always touchy feely and always wanting to give or receive massages. Especially when she's good and high. Believe me....I know. I've been on the receiving and giving end of the massages. However, we've never "messed around." Anyway, seeing as though they spent a lot of their free time together I already knew.... Oh...I left out that Cutiepie and her boyfriend broke up and he moved out. Well, this is when Bird and Cutiepie really started kicking it. The next thing I knew, Cutiepie moved in with Bird. know I was really jealous then. Why? I don't know. But I started acting real funny to Cutipie....for no reason. I guess I misdirected my jealous and frustrated feelings. For one, Bird used to always tell me about things her and Cutiepie used to do together. She'd tell me how they'd give each other massages. She'd tell me how they'd sit up smoking and talking. She'd tell me how they used to go out to eat, shopping, etc. All the while, I'm thinking, "That's what WE used to do!" Bird and I have a very candid relationship. So I was pretty up front with her about my jealous feelings and what not. She would make it seem like I had no reason to be jealous but yet and still would turn around and make comments about how cute Cutiepie was. She would never actually confirm that they were messing around but she would make little comments. I kind of felt like she was trying to make me jealous. But why would she do that?? I was just trippin.... I mean, I'm not going to even go into detail. Even though those details may paint a better picture of why I was jealous and frustrated with Bird. But...Cutiepie caught the brunt of it. Cutiepie and I drifted apart. If I came up there and she was there, I'd half speak to her. I was so rude....and I'm so ashamed. I am ashamed because Cutiepie and I were REAL one time. Honestly, I think I was just upset because I felt like she took my friend away from me. (so elementary) You know, I was excited about my friend moving down here. I was looking forward to us kicking it and doing whatever. But....we hardly kicked it. You're probably wondering, "Well damn, did you want to get with Bird or something?" I had to ask myself the same damn thing! (gasping!!!) I mean, I was literally questioning my sexuality for a minute. I even shared this with my boyfriend at the time. He just felt I was being elementary and that I'd get over it. LOL Little did he know...
Anyway, Christmas time was approaching. Bird bought Cutiepie all this stuff. She even came over to my apartment to wrap her gifts. Now you already know.... I was sitting there cutting my eyes at her. And this heifa didn't get me shii! (i can laugh now...but I was pissed). All the while, she was soooo excited about the gifts she bought Cutiepie. She was excited about their upcoming trip for New Years Eve to the west coast. It was during this visit that I just broke her down and FINALLY received confirmation (though I already knew) that Bird and Cutiepie were a damn couple and shit. Bird didn't want me to let Cutiepie know that I knew about them because Cutiepie wasn't ready to "come out." She figured she would let Cutiepie tell me herself. WTF-ever! Me and Cutiepie weren't even on the best of terms anyway. I wasn't going to say much of anything to her anyway. Especially about her and my friend that she stole. I know...I know. So wrong of me.
Fast forwarding to the beginning of the summer months. Both Bird and Cutiepie weren't working. So, they somehow decided to move. Bird wanted to move back to the "urrea" and Cutiepie decided to roll back with her. WHAT?!? This shii must be serious!! Yeah...Bird had only been here a year and was ready to move back to the "urrea." Well, they moved and I didn't talk to Bird or Cutiepie for a long ass time. Not surprising because Bird can be very flightly. Hence the name, Bird. She can go months without talking to her friends and shii will be cool with her. She'll just cut your ass off...for no reason. I'd call their house but never get a return phone call. Nobody would ever answer. Nothing. Come to think of was like that before they moved. Oh well. I'm going to have to make this a two part entry. Maybe even three. Shoot. I haven't even scratched the surface of being caught in the crossfire! Ya'll know I always have to set it up before actually telling my story. LOL Peace.

Friday, January 07, 2005


Happy New Year!!!

Happy, happy new year to everybody! (yes, i know i'm seven days late!) I brought the new year in up in good ole' Washington, DC. I had a blast. Saw old and new friends. It was great! Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to see everybody I would have liked to. Maybe next time! It was such a short trip. Anyway! Woohoo! Another year gone and another year come! Damn...time sure does fly, doesn't it? It seems like it was just 1989! Remember when 1999 seemed so far away? I'm not even going to get into what I used to think about the approach of the year 2000. I was going through my senior high school memory book( circa 1992) not too long ago. I came across a section where it said, "Where will you be 5 years from now? and Where will you be 10 years from now?" Well...according to my entries, I'm nothing close to where I said I'd be today nor was I five or ten years post high school graduation. LOL Not to say that I'm not currently happy in my current status. Obviously, those statements were PRE-college. Had I known then that I wouldn't be exactly guaranteed a job upon graduating from college, my answers may have been different. Even more, had I known that no matter what I majored in at college, I probably wouldn't be working in that field anyway, my answers would have been different as well. According to my 1992 prediction, I should currently be a well known television anchor woman/director/producer/journalist, married mother of two, living some where in Virginia. Why Virginia? I couldn't even tell you. The closer and closer I got to graduation from college, I became more and more dubious. Shii....I can tell you now, that I'm not doing anything in the television field. However, I am an UNmarried mother....of one. Not even CLOSE to marriage. I said all that to say that it's so funny how life never turns out how we expect or plan it to. I'm chillin though. I'm happy with life as I've come to know it. My life...that is. Sure, I could stand to make a few changes.'s a new year. Time to start anew anyway. I've already changed my cell phone number. Home number is coming up next. It is my goal to cut certain folks out of my life that weighed me down or I simply don't want to phuck with anymore. Ofcourse, I'm back on my New Year kick of wanting to become more spiritually in tune with myself and God (whoever he or she is). This time, I won't be hookin up with no damn wannabe Reverand/Sinister Minister. Anyhoo... I picked up the book, "The Purpose Driven Life" last month. I told myself that I was going to start it on January 1, 2005. Here it is, January 7, 2005. I haven't so much as read the introduction. Note to self: Need to work on being more disciplined. Also work on your time management. Ok. I'm still working on getting rid of my "mama weight." It's been two years now. I can't use the excuse, "I just had a baby." anymore. I'm still fine though! Thick and fine! LOL Another note to self: Work on being less conceited. hee hee Now if I could figure out a way to NOT deal with Sinister Minister.... Hmm....*rubbing chin* Oh...I guess I can't avoid that since we have a child together, huh? the way, Sinister Minister has a new addition in his life. Apparently, Sinister Minister's wife was pregnant AND had a baby last month. Funny...I didn't even know she was pregnant. He failed to mention it to me. Actually, he didn't intend on mentioning it to me. I happened to hear a baby crying in the background and asked him if he had a baby. He said he thought I heard the baby the other day in the background. WTF-ever! *smh* Oh....don't get me wrong. I'm not hardly upset that he has a baby. However, I recall asking him back in May or June before they got married, was she pregnant. He said nope. Again...WTF-ever! I hate liers. Ok.... I'm out. This was just a "blah, blah, blah" entry. I just decided to put something on her since it has been a serious minute since I've posted. I'm getting back in the swing of things now.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

< ? Blogs By Black Women # >