Monday, February 14, 2005
The Surreal Life-Bloggers Edition Episode 2
If you missed out on Edwige's Episode 1, The Surreal Life-Bloggers Edition, click here
“After quickly ducking into a restroom Ted returned as the Brutha Code fully dressed in his alter ego’s uniform….A throw back jersey sans undershirt easily displaying his Taco Meat. “
In addition to our procurement of a seven bedroom brownstone with en suite bathrooms, we also were given our own Range Rovers. Black for the guys and Red for the ladies. Since there are three Deltas in the house, red overruled for the ladies.
It wouldn’t be good TV if there weren’t any hand on booty details and drama. And so goes the story…..hee hee
Brutha Code offered to drive to the Penthouse since it was his idea. Not to mention he was a regular and didn’t have to pay for parking. BC jumped in the driver seat while Kajuana and Edwige argued over who was going to sit in the front passenger seat. With gimlet in hand, Kajuana commenced to rip Edwige apart with her words. “Ooooh!! You gone take dat girl?!?”, yelled BC to Edwige. But Edwige wasn’t one for words right now. The argument escalated and the next thing we knew, Edwige bust Kajuana dead in her jaw while screaming obscenities in French. Keep in mind; we all were “fucked up”. Somehow, Edwige ended up on the hood of the Range and attempted to do a round-house kick and fell on top of Kajuana and Panama, who was attempting to restrain Kajuana. Now Panama was pissed because as sexxy and tipsy as he was feeling, he wasn’t happy about Edwige scuffing up his new blue suede shoes. It was hilarious! Panama pushed both of the ladies off of him and retreated to the rear of the Range Rover to tend to his shoes. It isn’t easy being sexxy. Meanwhile, Brown Sugar, Christen and Will were standing there staring wide-eyed in disbelief at Edwige and Kajuana. Then out of nowhere, BC pushed Brown Sugar into the middle of Edwige’s and Kajuana’s female bout. Right at that moment, Brown Sugar caught a right hook thrown by Kajuana that was meant for Edwige. Brown Sugar, being the Master of “whoop ass” from all she learned in the mean streets of Flint and the Police Academy, tore into both of their asses! BC kept chanting in the background that he wanted to see some Asses jiggling one way or the other. The shit was hilarious. Christen started screaming and crying and threatened to call the police. At that, the ladies stopped fighting. After all, didn’t nobody want to go to jail. LOL Out of nowhere, BC comes up to Ed, KK and BS and starts rubbing his taco meat on them. Everybody bust out laughing and into the Range Rover we went. This time Brown Sugar got into the front seat and that was that. Before pulling off, Will said, “I have but one question. How the hell did you get on top of the hood Edwige?” Ed looked at BC and pointed at him. Somehow, we all missed BC giving Edwige a boost up on to the hood. They all shook their heads, laughed and off to the Penthouse they went!!! (50 cent Candy Shop playing in the background…AOL Music: 50 Cent: 'Candy Shop Damn I wish I knew how to add that shit to my page. Hahaha) *Side note I know you’re wondering how we cleaned ourselves up. This is TV man! We had hair and make-up artists on standby. They hooked us up before we seguewayed into next scene. Once again, we were looking and feeling FAB-U-LUST!!! *
We pulled up in front of the Penthouse. Since we were with BC we got the “star treatment.” As we walked inside of the Penthouse the tunes of “Christina Milian….Dip it Low. (Go-Go version, ofcourse)” Pop, pop, pop that thang! Roll it all around. I’ma show you how to make yo man say ohhhh!.” Was playing. The smell of the infamous stripper perfume and a tinge of sex was in the air. The crowd was light. So it wasn’t hard to find a spot to sit and chill. The ladies found a place to sit while the fellas went straight to the bar. Brown Sugar insisted on being close to the stage. She wanted to take mental notes. You know, so she could “pop that thang” if need be. LOL Plus, she had some singles she wanted to get rid of. Hee hee Christen, Edwige and Kajuana were a little nervous and it showed. This was their first time in a female strip club. However, after a few drinks, all of that nervousness came to pass. Brown Sugar was feeling right nice. While sitting at the table, she leaned over to BC and whispered in his ear. Brown Sugar asked him what he thought about buying table dances for Christen, Edwige and Kajuana. BC bust out laughing and said, "Hell yeah! Let's do that shit!" He leaned over and told Panama and Will what was up. They were all in aggreance. BC and Brown Sugar got up and pulled one of the strippers walking the floor, to the side. Her name was China Doll. They pointed the three ladies out to her. Brown Sugar advised China Doll that she wanted two other ladies who had the HOTTNESS and knew how to bring the shit. China Doll said she'd take care of it and walked away. Brown Sugar and BC headed back to the table. But not before passing by the bar first to grab a few glasses of Grand Marnier. They got back to the table just in time. "Disco Inferno" by 50 Cent came on and China Doll, Velvet and Hot Chocolate came over to the ladies. "Lil mama show me how you move it. Go 'head put yo back into it. Do your thang like it ain't nuthin to it....Shake, shake dat azz girl!" The next thing you knew, they were getting lap dances. The strippers were rubbing their body parts from the titties to their coochies all up on the ladies. Straight up ATL style! They were butt booty ass naked. Bending over and everything. They were working it! The looks on Christen, Edwige and Kajuana's faces were to die for! They weren't sure whether to be like, "Hell naw! or Keep going!" LOL Kajuana kept turning away but sneaking a peep here and there. Edwige couldn't take her eyes off of Hot Chocolate's titties. Damn, I can't believe this chicks titties are bigger than mine!" Edwige thought to herself. Christen just smiled....a nervous, tipsy smile. Before it was all over with, all three of the ladies were a little more hot and bothered than they cared to admit. While receiving their dances, their coochies were just a throbbin and a little wet from excitement! Meanwhile, Brown Sugar and the fellas were liking what they were seeing. Will was over there drooling. Literally... "Wipe yo mouf man!" said Brown Sugar. LOL "Come wipe it for me!" Will said. Brown Sugar raised her eyebrows and said, "I got something to wipe your mouth with alright." Normally, Will doesn't say much. But he was feeling right nice from the alcohol and well....felt the need to get a little frisky. Somehow Will and Brown Sugar snuck off and ended up in a stall in the ladies bathroom (if that's what you want to call it.) That left BC, Panama, Christen, Edwige and Kajuana. Well apparently, the combination of alcohol and lap dances, had everybody feeling a tad bit frisky. BC started feeling up Christen and Kajuana on the sly. Panama was feeling up Edwige. (after all, she is his cyber-fiance' hee hee). BC somehow talked Christen and Kajuana into going out to the Range Rover with him. But not before buying a bottle of Grand Marnier from the bar and the sexual dice that Brown Sugar gave him earlier in case some foreplay motivation was needed at some point. hee hee That left Panama and Edwige on the club and Will and Brown Sugar in the bathroom.
To be continued by Brutha Code (next Monday)
“After quickly ducking into a restroom Ted returned as the Brutha Code fully dressed in his alter ego’s uniform….A throw back jersey sans undershirt easily displaying his Taco Meat. “
In addition to our procurement of a seven bedroom brownstone with en suite bathrooms, we also were given our own Range Rovers. Black for the guys and Red for the ladies. Since there are three Deltas in the house, red overruled for the ladies.
It wouldn’t be good TV if there weren’t any hand on booty details and drama. And so goes the story…..hee hee
Brutha Code offered to drive to the Penthouse since it was his idea. Not to mention he was a regular and didn’t have to pay for parking. BC jumped in the driver seat while Kajuana and Edwige argued over who was going to sit in the front passenger seat. With gimlet in hand, Kajuana commenced to rip Edwige apart with her words. “Ooooh!! You gone take dat girl?!?”, yelled BC to Edwige. But Edwige wasn’t one for words right now. The argument escalated and the next thing we knew, Edwige bust Kajuana dead in her jaw while screaming obscenities in French. Keep in mind; we all were “fucked up”. Somehow, Edwige ended up on the hood of the Range and attempted to do a round-house kick and fell on top of Kajuana and Panama, who was attempting to restrain Kajuana. Now Panama was pissed because as sexxy and tipsy as he was feeling, he wasn’t happy about Edwige scuffing up his new blue suede shoes. It was hilarious! Panama pushed both of the ladies off of him and retreated to the rear of the Range Rover to tend to his shoes. It isn’t easy being sexxy. Meanwhile, Brown Sugar, Christen and Will were standing there staring wide-eyed in disbelief at Edwige and Kajuana. Then out of nowhere, BC pushed Brown Sugar into the middle of Edwige’s and Kajuana’s female bout. Right at that moment, Brown Sugar caught a right hook thrown by Kajuana that was meant for Edwige. Brown Sugar, being the Master of “whoop ass” from all she learned in the mean streets of Flint and the Police Academy, tore into both of their asses! BC kept chanting in the background that he wanted to see some Asses jiggling one way or the other. The shit was hilarious. Christen started screaming and crying and threatened to call the police. At that, the ladies stopped fighting. After all, didn’t nobody want to go to jail. LOL Out of nowhere, BC comes up to Ed, KK and BS and starts rubbing his taco meat on them. Everybody bust out laughing and into the Range Rover we went. This time Brown Sugar got into the front seat and that was that. Before pulling off, Will said, “I have but one question. How the hell did you get on top of the hood Edwige?” Ed looked at BC and pointed at him. Somehow, we all missed BC giving Edwige a boost up on to the hood. They all shook their heads, laughed and off to the Penthouse they went!!! (50 cent Candy Shop playing in the background…AOL Music: 50 Cent: 'Candy Shop Damn I wish I knew how to add that shit to my page. Hahaha) *Side note I know you’re wondering how we cleaned ourselves up. This is TV man! We had hair and make-up artists on standby. They hooked us up before we seguewayed into next scene. Once again, we were looking and feeling FAB-U-LUST!!! *
We pulled up in front of the Penthouse. Since we were with BC we got the “star treatment.” As we walked inside of the Penthouse the tunes of “Christina Milian….Dip it Low. (Go-Go version, ofcourse)” Pop, pop, pop that thang! Roll it all around. I’ma show you how to make yo man say ohhhh!.” Was playing. The smell of the infamous stripper perfume and a tinge of sex was in the air. The crowd was light. So it wasn’t hard to find a spot to sit and chill. The ladies found a place to sit while the fellas went straight to the bar. Brown Sugar insisted on being close to the stage. She wanted to take mental notes. You know, so she could “pop that thang” if need be. LOL Plus, she had some singles she wanted to get rid of. Hee hee Christen, Edwige and Kajuana were a little nervous and it showed. This was their first time in a female strip club. However, after a few drinks, all of that nervousness came to pass. Brown Sugar was feeling right nice. While sitting at the table, she leaned over to BC and whispered in his ear. Brown Sugar asked him what he thought about buying table dances for Christen, Edwige and Kajuana. BC bust out laughing and said, "Hell yeah! Let's do that shit!" He leaned over and told Panama and Will what was up. They were all in aggreance. BC and Brown Sugar got up and pulled one of the strippers walking the floor, to the side. Her name was China Doll. They pointed the three ladies out to her. Brown Sugar advised China Doll that she wanted two other ladies who had the HOTTNESS and knew how to bring the shit. China Doll said she'd take care of it and walked away. Brown Sugar and BC headed back to the table. But not before passing by the bar first to grab a few glasses of Grand Marnier. They got back to the table just in time. "Disco Inferno" by 50 Cent came on and China Doll, Velvet and Hot Chocolate came over to the ladies. "Lil mama show me how you move it. Go 'head put yo back into it. Do your thang like it ain't nuthin to it....Shake, shake dat azz girl!" The next thing you knew, they were getting lap dances. The strippers were rubbing their body parts from the titties to their coochies all up on the ladies. Straight up ATL style! They were butt booty ass naked. Bending over and everything. They were working it! The looks on Christen, Edwige and Kajuana's faces were to die for! They weren't sure whether to be like, "Hell naw! or Keep going!" LOL Kajuana kept turning away but sneaking a peep here and there. Edwige couldn't take her eyes off of Hot Chocolate's titties. Damn, I can't believe this chicks titties are bigger than mine!" Edwige thought to herself. Christen just smiled....a nervous, tipsy smile. Before it was all over with, all three of the ladies were a little more hot and bothered than they cared to admit. While receiving their dances, their coochies were just a throbbin and a little wet from excitement! Meanwhile, Brown Sugar and the fellas were liking what they were seeing. Will was over there drooling. Literally... "Wipe yo mouf man!" said Brown Sugar. LOL "Come wipe it for me!" Will said. Brown Sugar raised her eyebrows and said, "I got something to wipe your mouth with alright." Normally, Will doesn't say much. But he was feeling right nice from the alcohol and well....felt the need to get a little frisky. Somehow Will and Brown Sugar snuck off and ended up in a stall in the ladies bathroom (if that's what you want to call it.) That left BC, Panama, Christen, Edwige and Kajuana. Well apparently, the combination of alcohol and lap dances, had everybody feeling a tad bit frisky. BC started feeling up Christen and Kajuana on the sly. Panama was feeling up Edwige. (after all, she is his cyber-fiance' hee hee). BC somehow talked Christen and Kajuana into going out to the Range Rover with him. But not before buying a bottle of Grand Marnier from the bar and the sexual dice that Brown Sugar gave him earlier in case some foreplay motivation was needed at some point. hee hee That left Panama and Edwige on the club and Will and Brown Sugar in the bathroom.
To be continued by Brutha Code (next Monday)
Comments:
<< Home
Well, I only took it where ya'll wanted me to take it. LOL Nothing like a good ole freaky deaky episode to get shit started!
Hellz bellz!! I'll have you kow, I have been to a female strip club before. I found them to be lazy!
@KK, this is made for tv man! LOL Lazy you say? Well, you obviously haven't been to one down here in ATL. Those gals put in some work! LOL
Now how in the HELL am I supposed to follow this up?? Strip Clubs?? Fights??? TACO MEAT!!???
I have quite the task ahead of me, but I shall not falter...
I have quite the task ahead of me, but I shall not falter...
Oh my instigating BC...you MUST not falter! I called you instigating BC because in the Surreal Life....at least my entry, you were quite the instigator. I'll be looking forward to your follow-up fasho!! Keep it tight! Keep it tight! Aight?!? Be sure to include the HOB details! Feel free to ad lib as you must. hee hee The more drama the better!!! I'll be more than happy to assist with some HOB details.
LOL @ Xquizzyt1!!!! Skee-oops?!?You are fun-nee!!! Dirty Red Ranges!!! Ha! You are a hoot! Yeah girl...it seems as though Will is in popular demand these days. Lemme find out he has women wanting to fight over him. I don't play that! *shank* LMAO!!!
Well APPRARENTLY I missed out on the fact that you ONE had a cyber fiance' TWO a Valentine AND THREE another woman willing to fight over you! Is Brown Sugar gonna have to cut a beeyatch & knickah? (say like Wayne Brady episode on Dave Chappelle)
You guys are too funny! I love the little network that you have. I have to second my Soror's sentiment on the "Extreme Pink" Range Rovers... LOL!
Nicely Done Gurl! Mad Greek Love!
Nicely Done Gurl! Mad Greek Love!
WOW this is going to be so exciting. I hope next week blog will be able to top Brown Sugar cause you know her imagination and story telling is of a true author. No you cant consult her.
Post a Comment
# posted by 
: Fri Feb 18, 12:48:00 PM
: Fri Feb 18, 12:48:00 PM << Home
